During my first few days of In Country Training we were advised by VSOs Big Man on how to open a bank account so we can be paid our allowance. At this point the new volunteers had no idea how difficult this would be.
You will be proud to know that I am actually the only VSO I know of in Nigeria that has managed to open an account, and it was pretty easy too!
Cutting a very long story (of 4 visits and several text messages from the bank manager) short I now have, not only a bank account, but also a chip and pin :0)
I have highlighted 4 points to give you a sense of UBA
• I have no idea why I find it so difficult but I always have trouble entering the bank. Only one person is allowed to enter or leave the bank at a time and for a few moments you are enclosed in a capsule and you have to surrender your phone above your head! I somehow manage to always step in wrongly and delay the procedure. I have discovered it is best to leave your bag (including phone and purse) in the car.
• The most shocking part was that, on my 4th visit, as soon as I had collected my debit card from one assistant and my pin number from a another, the banks guard (who is now my friend, Harry) took them both from me and proceeded out through the door first, leaving me inside, while he was outside with my card and pin number!!! This would never happen in England. When I joined him outside he then took me to the ATM and showed me how to use it step by step! I think he thought that because I always have trouble getting through the electronic door that I also needed help with withdrawing cash!
• There was no sense of order. I handed over passport photos on the first visit and then on the second, when they were needed, Jayne, the assistant emptied an A4 brown envelope of small passport photos onto the desk and proceeded to sift through them until she found mine. Also 2 huge piles of pin numbers were flicked through until my name was found! Ever heard of alphabetical order?
• My last highlight is that my colleague, whom I had never been to the bank with, was told on his visit to the bank that my debit card was ready to pick up! I have no idea how they know we work together. Also another time, when I was in Abuja, a text said ‘when you are back in Jigawa. . . !‘ How did they even know I had left Jigawa? Now I realise that I am living in a small town!
VSO office and other volunteers are all amazed that I have managed to open a bank account. Temporary visas and photocopies of passports were not accepted by the bank managers in their towns. I feel honoured to be accepted here in Dutse.
Thursday 30 September 2010
Tuesday 21 September 2010
Abracadabra
I am in a new town this week: Kaduna. There are 4 other VSOs living here, one of whom is also on the Class Teacher training workshop.
I learnt 2 amazing facts today. One, wonderful fact which will make you raise your eyebrows and smile, the other will make you very sad and subdued.
2. Only 17 out of 21,000 teachers assessed scored 80% on a teacher baseline assessment which is about the equavelent to Year 4 level of maths, reading and punctuaion skills! This was for a state in the south of Nigeria. Our results in the North are yet to be published and are apparantly even more shocking!
1. I randomly learnt (not part of the workshop) that abra ka dabra probably originated from Arabic. Apparently 'ka' means 'like' so the phrase translates something like - let this be like that - which makes complete sense when you wave your wand to cast a spell! I love it!
I learnt 2 amazing facts today. One, wonderful fact which will make you raise your eyebrows and smile, the other will make you very sad and subdued.
2. Only 17 out of 21,000 teachers assessed scored 80% on a teacher baseline assessment which is about the equavelent to Year 4 level of maths, reading and punctuaion skills! This was for a state in the south of Nigeria. Our results in the North are yet to be published and are apparantly even more shocking!
1. I randomly learnt (not part of the workshop) that abra ka dabra probably originated from Arabic. Apparently 'ka' means 'like' so the phrase translates something like - let this be like that - which makes complete sense when you wave your wand to cast a spell! I love it!
Monday 20 September 2010
The Kennedys
This post is dedicated to my wonderful family :0)
They were most upset that only Fiona got a mention in my first blog post because we did the car boot sale together. So this was taken on my last night in England and as you can see, they are very happy that I am going! So happy in fact, that I have only received one phone call from them collectively so far. A phone call in which I had to arrange a time for them to phone me!However we are getting the hang of Skype, which is brilliant, and we are perfecting the few second time delay, a skill for me which I have to get used to when conversing with Nigerians. Before you ask your simple question here you must spend 5 minutes giving the background, then you can ask the question. All this has to be done without pausing for breath. If you wait for clarification or a simple ‘yes’ confirmation (like a nod of the head) then you won’t have chance to finish what you are saying! They will have jumped in and answered whatever they want and will be talking for the next five minutes without pausing or checking that you are understanding, following or even listening!
This is similar to the Skype time delay conversations. If you pause mid point, like you normally do in conversations for people to agree or give a gesture, etc. then conversation gets confusing.
Here are my dedicated family doing the final carboot sale was done with the last of my stuff. Another £43 was raised for VSO. Thank you.
Also, thank you to everyone who has additionally donated through just giving. :0)
Friday 17 September 2010
Barka da Sallah (Happy Sallah)
On Wednesday we all left the office early to begin the Sallah celebrations which ends the fasting of Ramadan. I managed to get a lift to Kano, a very busy, large, ancient city, for 5 days to meet up with Sophie and 13 other VSOs who had all travelled from various states!As you can see, Sophie has real fun accommodation. Her house is spread around the outside of a courtyard with huge trees in the middle. The bedrooms, toilet (as shown in the photo), shower, kitchen and lounge area are all doors off the courtyard. As you can see the lounge area doesn’t have
walls all the way around but just mosquito netting and so whenever you wanted to go to another room you had to pass through the courtyard. This made it feel like you were living outside and reminded me of camping.There is no running water except for one small tap in the garden so every morning when the water was running we had to fill up big dustbins, one in the toilet, one in the shower and one in the kitchen. (Notice Sophie filling buckets). As far as I could tell, the water only
runs for a few hours each morning if you are lucky. Fortunately we all managed to throw the cold water over ourselves each morning and called it a shower! Flushing the toilet takes an incredible amount of water so that definitely had to be rationed.Many strange and wonderful things happened to us in Kano during the Sallah break;
• The first morning the Muslims broke the fast Sophie and I were trying (everywhere was closed) to get phone credit breakfast for everyone. Back and forward across the street, amid the cries of ‘Barka da Sallah’ a random man, who was from Sudan, came chasing after us. He said he had seen Sophie out and about and wanted to invite her to eat with his family. So. . . leaving hungry VSOs behind, we followed him into his house and ate with the female members of his family!
• One of my colleagues invited us to his village which was on the outskirts of Kano, so 2 of us went in his car and met his extended family, friends and had a tour of the pottery. We were fed a lot of food as you can see, but they didn’t join us in the eating and drinking; just watched us! We also met his grandmother who they said was 106 years old! (Grandmother is second from left, my colleague is in the middle with his aunties.) 
We somehow managed to get into the Emir’s palace (the Muslim religious leader) to watch the Durbar (horse parades representing each district in Kano) by just flashing our VSO ID cards! I include this photo because it shows the policeman in black with his large gun casually taking photos on his camera phone! You can also see that it is women and children who had to sit on the dirt at the front while men and foreigners got the seats! If at any time the females stood up there was a huge roar from the men that they couldn’t see.
• The next day Sophie had a friend who amazingly managed to get all 11 of us VSOs into the Government House to meet the Emir. All the heads of districts came and bowed down to him and then there was a speech from the Emir, followed by the Governor. We were sat just 3 rows behind the Emir. (He is wearing the red hat on the bottom right). At several points his chief guard stood up and opened his glittery cloak to shield him, like a huge butterfly!
Here I am sharing lunch with the Emir and the Governor!
• After a rest and an Indian buffet lunch I then went exploring (by motorbike) with a Kenyan VSO, to various markets, the dye pits and to the top of Dala hill where you have a full view of the city.
After writing this I now realise why I have been so tired this week at work. I have also been moving into my accommodation this week! Further stories to come!
P.S. See Jenny's blog for more Durbar information. She highlights different points from me!
Tuesday 7 September 2010
Short Stories by Lucy in Dutse (don’t pronounce the ‘t’ in Dutse)
1. Three (out of many) brilliant statements made by my colleague:
“You are not looking so smart today in your knickers!” said to my friend who was wearing cropped trousers.
“I will give you five minutes. This is a one minute exercise.” said to participants at the workshop.
“I will answer this question quickly as time is against us.” 25 minutes later he stopped talking!
Me, my colleague Kalli, and the consultant Barbara who came for the Financial Planning Workshop. Barbara secretly bought me a kettle and mugs as a surprise for my new accommodation ready for when I finally move.
2. On my first night, I was woken by the rattling of the windows, the howling of the wind and the sound of heavy rain on the roof. Outside the trees were wildly blowing and the rumble of thunder was continuous along with the bright flashes of lightning that flickered constantly. The next morning I mentioned to the driver about the huge storm and he shot me down sharply, shouting, “No, no, no! Not a storm! Just the rain!”
3. The ESSPIN office is very posh, as nice as any in England. But, as it is has become too crowded, they have asked for more office space within the States Education Board office area. After requesting the new offices to be cleaned and swept on the previous day, the deputy office manager declared that the office move would take place this morning.
So, the drivers piled in about 5 large bags/boxes of documents and 8 of us got promptly driven to the new offices.
Upon arrival it turns out that there are only 2 very small offices with 2 very small desks in each room! It was immediately clear that we would not all fit. While I squeezed quietly into a corner, the 7 large Nigerian men, in billowing white robes, undertook long, loud discussions, much moving of furniture, (which resulted in a broken desk) plenty of movement between the offices along with lots of opening and closing of doors.
I was sent back to the ESSPIN office, laughing to myself in disbelief at the disorganisation of the procedure. It has been announced that I will be used as bait, for speed of gaining the extra office required as soon as possible. (This happened a month ago and have heard nothing yet!)
4. One morning I borrowed Igwe’s (guest house manager’s) clean shiny bike to do some exercise, not realising that is had no gears, the brakes didn’t work and the saddle would not stay upright! I still managed to cycle for half an hour, awkwardly hovering on the saddle and carefully crossing the roads. I guess all of their bikes are like this, or worse and often they are carrying huge loads too.
5. On Saturday mornings I trek (the word ‘walk’ is not understood for some reason, so you go trekking everywhere) to the local field to run around the football pitch. It is full of adults (95% men) playing football, running, athletics, basketball and squash. This week I was asked to join the local girls’ volleyball team. Although not a huge fan of volleyball, I luckily did myself proud as they quickly realised I was a good setter. Although if you did not shout “A-MEN” after every point you won then the coach got really cross with you. Twice the coach made girls roll in the dirt for doing a bad pass and if they did it again he said he would make them roll in muddy puddle!! He said, “One day you will thank me for the punishments.” Despite the abuse I am going back again. I enjoyed the singing and dancing warm ups and the female company.
6. The best part about living in the guest house is that you get to meet many interesting people. Last week, the 3 new guests took me to the local Greek restaurant each night, trekking in the dark, through the mud and in the rain!
On the last night I ordered pounded yam and vegetable soup. The pounded yam has a consistency like play dough and the vegetable soup is not watery, but a moist mash of vegetables, mainly spinach. You are supposed to eat this kind of dish with your fingers.
Although I have already had some practise at this, I get a bit nervous as I know the Nigerians are watching me proudly enjoy their dinner in their manner. Of course, you get really messy and the nerves made my hand slightly shake! So I ate really fast to get it over with. Then, the Nigerian man sitting opposite me promptly ordered me some more because he thought I loved it so much!! Luckily it did taste good.
“You are not looking so smart today in your knickers!” said to my friend who was wearing cropped trousers.
“I will give you five minutes. This is a one minute exercise.” said to participants at the workshop.
“I will answer this question quickly as time is against us.” 25 minutes later he stopped talking!
Me, my colleague Kalli, and the consultant Barbara who came for the Financial Planning Workshop. Barbara secretly bought me a kettle and mugs as a surprise for my new accommodation ready for when I finally move.2. On my first night, I was woken by the rattling of the windows, the howling of the wind and the sound of heavy rain on the roof. Outside the trees were wildly blowing and the rumble of thunder was continuous along with the bright flashes of lightning that flickered constantly. The next morning I mentioned to the driver about the huge storm and he shot me down sharply, shouting, “No, no, no! Not a storm! Just the rain!”
3. The ESSPIN office is very posh, as nice as any in England. But, as it is has become too crowded, they have asked for more office space within the States Education Board office area. After requesting the new offices to be cleaned and swept on the previous day, the deputy office manager declared that the office move would take place this morning.
So, the drivers piled in about 5 large bags/boxes of documents and 8 of us got promptly driven to the new offices.
Upon arrival it turns out that there are only 2 very small offices with 2 very small desks in each room! It was immediately clear that we would not all fit. While I squeezed quietly into a corner, the 7 large Nigerian men, in billowing white robes, undertook long, loud discussions, much moving of furniture, (which resulted in a broken desk) plenty of movement between the offices along with lots of opening and closing of doors.
I was sent back to the ESSPIN office, laughing to myself in disbelief at the disorganisation of the procedure. It has been announced that I will be used as bait, for speed of gaining the extra office required as soon as possible. (This happened a month ago and have heard nothing yet!)
4. One morning I borrowed Igwe’s (guest house manager’s) clean shiny bike to do some exercise, not realising that is had no gears, the brakes didn’t work and the saddle would not stay upright! I still managed to cycle for half an hour, awkwardly hovering on the saddle and carefully crossing the roads. I guess all of their bikes are like this, or worse and often they are carrying huge loads too.
5. On Saturday mornings I trek (the word ‘walk’ is not understood for some reason, so you go trekking everywhere) to the local field to run around the football pitch. It is full of adults (95% men) playing football, running, athletics, basketball and squash. This week I was asked to join the local girls’ volleyball team. Although not a huge fan of volleyball, I luckily did myself proud as they quickly realised I was a good setter. Although if you did not shout “A-MEN” after every point you won then the coach got really cross with you. Twice the coach made girls roll in the dirt for doing a bad pass and if they did it again he said he would make them roll in muddy puddle!! He said, “One day you will thank me for the punishments.” Despite the abuse I am going back again. I enjoyed the singing and dancing warm ups and the female company.
6. The best part about living in the guest house is that you get to meet many interesting people. Last week, the 3 new guests took me to the local Greek restaurant each night, trekking in the dark, through the mud and in the rain!
On the last night I ordered pounded yam and vegetable soup. The pounded yam has a consistency like play dough and the vegetable soup is not watery, but a moist mash of vegetables, mainly spinach. You are supposed to eat this kind of dish with your fingers.
Although I have already had some practise at this, I get a bit nervous as I know the Nigerians are watching me proudly enjoy their dinner in their manner. Of course, you get really messy and the nerves made my hand slightly shake! So I ate really fast to get it over with. Then, the Nigerian man sitting opposite me promptly ordered me some more because he thought I loved it so much!! Luckily it did taste good.
Here I am in the restaurant eating with my fingers.
7. After a week of eating out in the local Greek restaurant that sold no Greek food and had the same 4 dishes on the menu each night, a visiting consultant made up this limerick for me:
There was a young lady called Lucy
Who came out to work here in Dutse,
She stopped eating ham,
'Cause she loved pounded yam
With vegetable soup and egusi.
8. One of the guards taught me the trick to having clean smelling clothes, which I was pleased about as one of the things I was starting to miss was fresh, clean clothes. You spray room freshener on them as you iron them.
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